In an attempt to thwart the spread of bird flu,
George W. Bush has bombed the Canary Islands.

Why Men Do Yoga

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Umro Slobo i dođe on Sv. Petru pred vrata Raja.

Lupa ko blesav po vratima i pita ga Sv. Petar:
"Što ti radiš ovdje?"

Veli mu Slobo:
"Hoću u Raj!"
Veli Sv. Petar:
"Marš, goni se ti lijepo u pakao!" i zalupi vratima.

Za desetak dana, lupa netko k'o lud na vrata Raja, hoće provaliti kroz njih. Otvara Sv. Petar vrata, ugleda 14 Vragova i pita ih:
"Što vi radite ovdje?"
"Izbjeglice!" odgovara jedan među njima.

Sta radi crnogorski virus u kompjuteru?
NISTA.

Dve babe pričaju o unucima.

Jedna kaže drugoj: "Moj je unuk skroz poshizeo. Celu noč sedi pred kompjuterom, kuca po
tipkovnicu, pa nešto priča kompjuteru i telefon nikad nije slobodan. Ništa neče biti od njega."

Na to druga baba kaže: "Moj unuk biče doktor ili pilot."

"Odkud znaš?", pita druga baba.

"Pa kad god da udjem u njegovu sobu špricevi svuda i on kaže - babo hajde da letimo."

INDIAN NAMES

A little Indian boy asked his father, the big chief and witch doctor of the tribe, "Papa, why is it that we always have long names, while the white men have shorter names - Bill, Texor Sam, for example?"

His father replied, "Look, son, our names represent a symbol, a sign, or a poem for our culture not like the white men, who live all together and repeat their names from generation to generation. Also, it is part of our makeup that in spite of everything, we survive. For example, your sister's name is Small Romantic Moon Over The Lake, because on the night she was born, there was a beautiful moon reflected in the lake. Then there's your brother, Big White Horse of the Prairies, because he was born on a day that the big white horse who gallops over the prairies of the world appeared near our camp and is a symbol of our capacity to live and the life force of our people. It's very simple and easy to understand. Do you have any other questions, Little Broken Condom Made in China?"

KOLO

Janezek zadnji dan pouka prinese iz sole domov odlicno spricevalo.

"Mami, za tako lepo spricevalo mi morata kupiti kolo!"

"Janezek, spricevalo je res lepo, toda kolo... Ne vem, ce bo ocka za to. Vprasala ga bova, ko se vrne iz sluzbe."

"Mami, ce mi ne kupis kolesa se pa hocem zvecer igrati s teboj mamico in ocka! Sama izberi, kaj ti je ljubse."

Ko se je Janezkov oce vrnil domov, mu je zena povedala za otrokov ultimat.

Oce nekaj casa premisljuje, potem pa rece: "Ves kaj, kolo stane danes dvajset tisocakov. Ceneje bo, ce se gresta zvecer igrat ocka in mamico, pa bova prihranila denar."

Zvecer se je Janezek odpravil v spalnico, oce pa si je pripravil lezisce v dnevni sobi na kavcu. Janezek se vleze vznak na posteljo, obe roki namesti pod glavo, nekaj casa gleda v strop, nato a zavpije:

"Stara, jutri bova mulcu kupila kolo!"