Dva moška se zgovarjata:
»Ti, a veš, da sem odkril izvrstnega psihiatra. Pomisli, ozdravil mi je ženo.«
»Kaj ji je pa bilo?«
»Anoreksija. Večine jedi ni hotela jesti.«
»In kaj ji je predpisal?«
»Nič. Samo rekel ji je, da je to prvi znak staranja.«



Dejstvo izpod peresa Evgena Juriča:

Ko še ni bilo toaletnega papirja, so ljudje veliko več brali časopise.

Guys vs. Men


Men: know what they want to be doing five years down the road.
Guys: are not sure what they want to be doing later tonight.

Men: read Crichton, watch Rather, play golf.
Guys: read King, watch Seinfeld, play poker.

Men: wear ties with stripes, shirts with buttons, and shoes with laces.
Guys: wear high school T-shirts they've actually owned since high school.

Men: think perfume (yours) is a turn-on.
Guys: think sweat (theirs) is a turn-on.

Men: balance their checkbooks.
Guys: balance their loans so that they never hit up the same buddy twice in a row.

Men: claim to be feminist but still insist on opening doors, driving, and paying for dinner.
Guys: claim to be feminists so they can let YOU open doors, drive, and pay for dinner.

Men: are afraid of becoming their fathers.
Guys: are afraid of becoming men.

Men: put you on the phone when their mothers call.
Guys: pretend you're not there when their moms call.

Men: start their own businesses.
Guys: quit their jobs.

Men: are experts on women's erogenous zones.
Guys: are experts on their own erogenous zone.

Men: order wine based on more than the price.
Guys: bring their own beer.

THERE'S A LOT OF SADNESS IN THE WORLD...


Right now, as you read this,
427 Million people are having SEX!

And you're on the computer!



ARS

 Sva že dva; dodatna.

Sicer pa, zakva pa zdej to reklamo povsod zraven limaš?   ???


ARS

Quote:


A niso lepi taki veliki smeškoti?

LP Harry

Stefan je povabil svojo mamo na vecerjo v svoje studentsko stanovanje.
Med vecerjo je njegova mama ugotovila, da je njegova sostanovalka iz sosednjega
stanovanja, Julija, zelo lepo dekle. Ze nekaj casa ji je po glavi rojila
misel, da imata morda le tesnejsi odnos. Nenadoma se je pocutila nesigurno...
Med vecerjo, ju je opazovala. Veckrat se je vprasala, ali ima Stefan z
lepo sostanovalko mogoce le vec skupnega, kot normalno oko lahko vidi. Stefan
je videl zamisljeno mamo in rekel: "Draga mama, vem kaj mislis, ampak lahko mi
verjames, ona je samo moja sostanovalka in nic vec!"

Priblizno teden kasneje pravi Julija: "Stefan, odkar je bila tvoja mama
na obisku, pogresam majhen lonec. Nikjer ga ne najdem!"
Stefan pravi: "Ne verjamem, da ga je mama nesla s seboj, vseeno pa ji bom pisal."

Vsedel se je za mizo in pisal: "Draga mama, ne recem, da si vzela moj
lonec s sabo, in tudi ne recem, da ga nisi vzela. Dejstvo pa je, odkar si bila
pri nas na vecerji, pogresam lonec. Tvoj Stefan"

Nekaj dni kasneje je dobil Stefan pismo. Odpre ga in bere:
"Dragi Stefan, ne recem, da ti z Julijo spis, in tudi ne recem, da ti z Julijo ne spis.
Dejstvo pa je, ce bi ona spala v svoji postelji, bi lonec ze zdavnaj nasla...Tvoja mama."

When the Lord made Man, all the parts of the body argued over who would be Boss.

The Brain explained that since he controlled all the pars of the body, he should be Boss.

The Legs argued that since they took the Man wherever he wanted to go, he should be Boss.

The Stomach countered with the explanation thet since he digested all the food, he should be Boss.

The Eyes said thet without them, Man would be helpless, so they should be Boss.

The the Ass Hole applied for the job.

The other parts of the body laughed so hard that the ass hole became mad and closed up.

After a few days the Brain went foggy, the Legs got wobbly, the Stomach got ill, the Eyes got crossed and unable to see.

They all conceded and made the Ass Hole Boss.

This proves that you do not have to be a Brain to be Boss…

Just an Ass Hole.



PS: Sej je res že stara, ampak ...