350,4  

Soncno jesensko popoldne.
Oce lezi na smrtni postelji.
Ob njem je v zadnjih uricah tudi njegov sin.
Oce iz kuhinje zavoha prečudovit vonj po sveze pečenih kolackih (zenina specialiteta!).
Pogleda sina in rece s slabotnim glasom:
"Sine, skoci, prosim, mami v kuhinjo in mi prinesi kaksen kolacek."                            
Sine takoj odvihra v kuhinjo in pride nazaj praznih rok.
Pogleda oceta in zalostno rece:
"Mami ne pusti, ker pravi, da so jutri za pogreb."

Little Jack was in his 5th grade class when the teacher asked the
children
what their fathers did for a living.
All the typical answers came up -- Fireman, policeman, salesman,
etc...
Jack was being uncharacteristically quiet and so the teacher asked him
about his father.

"My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his
clothes In front of other men. Sometimes, if the offer's really good,
he'll
go out to the alley with some guy and make love wit him"
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the
other
children to work on some coloring, and took Little Jack aside to ask
him,
"Is that really true about your father?"

"No," said Jack, "He works for the Bush administration, but I was too
embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."

Došao Srbin u restoran usred Zagreba.
Pristupi mu konobar i zapita ga:
"Poštovani gospodin želi?"
"Supu."
"Poštovani gospodin sigurno misli juhu. Želi možda još nešto?"
"Bečku šniclu."
"Poštovani gospodin sigurno misli bečki odrezak. Želi možda još nešto?"
"Srpsku salatu. A ti sad prevedi kako hočeš, pička ti materina"

> > PRIJAVNICA ZA SHOW JERRYJA SPRINGERJA
> >
> > Bi radi prisostvovali snemanju Jerry Springer
> > Show-a?
> >
> > Stvar je zelo preprosta: izpolnite spodnji formular.
> >
> > IME(oznacite ustrezno ime):
> >
> > - Billy-Bob
> > - Billy-Joe
> > - Billy-Ray
> > - Billy-Sue
> > - Billy-Mae
> > - Billy-Jack
> >
> >
> > KAKO VAS KLICEJO :
> > - Booger
> > - Bubba
> > - Junior
> > - Sissy
> > - Drugo____________
> >
> > IME MATERE(ce niste prepricani, pustite prazen
> >
> > prostor):____________________________________
> >
> > IME OCETA (ce niste prepricani, pustite prazen
> >
> > prostor):____________________________________
> >
> > OCE IN MATI STA BILA PRED SKLENITVIJO ZAKONSKE ZVEZE
> > :
> >
> > - brat in sestra
> > - bratranec in sestricna
> > - sestri
> > - brata
> >
> > STAROST (ce niste povsem prepricani, navedite
> > priblizno
> >
> > starost):__________________________________
> >
> > IZOBRAZBA (obkrozite najvisji koncani razred osnovne
> > sole) :
> >
> > 1 2 3 4
> >
> > STEVILKA CEVLJEV: levi____________
> > desni______________
> >
> > BARVA OCI : levo____________
> > desno_____________________
> >
> > BARVA LAS :
> >
> > - plava
> > - crna
> > - rdeca
> > - rjava
> > - bela
> >
> > BARVA ZOB :
> >
> > - rumena
> > - sivkasto rumena
> > - siva
> > - crna
> > - nimam zob
> >
> > POKLIC :
> >
> > - kmet
> > - mehanik
> > - frizer
> > - nezaposlen
> > - pokvarjen politik
> > - pridigar
> >
> >
> > KAKO POGOSTO SE TUSIRATE :
> >
> > - enkrat tedensko
> > - enkrat mesecno
> > - se ne tusiram
> >
> > IME PARTNERJA :__________________________
> >
> > IME DRUGEGA PARTNERJA :______________________
> >
> > IME TRETJEGA PARTNERJA :___________________________
> >
> > IME LJUBIMCA
> > :_________________________________________
> >
> > PARTNER VAM JE : - sestra
> >
> > - brat
> > - teta
> > - stric
> > - bratranec
> > - mati
> > - oce
> > - sin
> > - hci
> > - hisni ljubljencek
> >
> > STEVILO OTROK V VASEM GOSPODINJSTVU : ____________
> >
> > STEVILO VASIH OTROK : __________________________
> >
> > KOLIKO AVTOMOBILOV IMATE :_____________________
> >
> > KOLIKO OD TEGA JE VOZNIH :________________________
> >
> > MODEL IN LETO IZDELAVE VASEGA POLTOVORNJAKA :
> >
> > 196______________
> >
> > KAKSNO OROZJE POSEDUJETE :___________________
> >
> > KJE IMATE SPRAVLJENO OROZJE :
> > - avto
> > - spalnica
> > - kopalnica
> > - kuhinja
> >
> > KOLIKOKRAT STE VIDELI NEZNANE LETECE PREDMETE:
> >
> >
> _______________________________________________________
> >
> > KOLIKOKRAT STE V ZADNJIH 5 LETIH VIDELI ELVISA
> > PRESLEYA:
> >
> >
> _______________________________________________________
> >
> > KOLIKOKRAT STE VIDELI ELVISA V NEZNANEM LETECEM
> > PREDMETU:
> >
> >
> _______________________________________________________
> >
> > KOLIKO JE VASA HISA ODDALJENA OD ASFALTIRANE CESTE :
> >
> > - eno miljo
> > - dve milji
> > - takoj cez polje
> >
> >
> _______________________________________________________
> >