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tomi
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Kaj pa če je vse RES???

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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #60 - 01.03.2003 at 20:45:43
 
Ja, je... Wink
Ugibam, da si mislila Andresa s tem...? Malo se mi zdi, da že poznam vaše muhe tu na forumu... Popravi, če se motim.. Grin
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Pametni razpravljajo o idejah,&&povprečneži o dogodkih,&&omejeni pa o ljudeh. &&(Hyman Rickover)&&
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #61 - 01.03.2003 at 23:55:17
 
tomi wrote on 01.03.2003 at 20:45:43:
... muhe tu na forumu... Popravi, če se motim.. Grin

...

...


Grin
ARS
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« Last Edit: 03.03.2003 at 20:34:55 by ARS »  

Knowing what's right doesn't mean much unless you do what's right. (neznan(a)
 
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What women want in a man
Reply #62 - 02.03.2003 at 01:28:21
 
Original List (age 22)
1. Handsome
2. Charming
3. Financially successful
4. A caring listener
5. Witty
6. In good shape
7. Dresses with style
8. Appreciates finer things
9. Full of thoughtful surprises
10. An imaginative, romantic lover

Revised List (age 32)
1. Nice looking (prefer hair on his head)
2. Opens car doors, holds chairs
3. Has enough money for a nice dinner
4. Listens more than talks
5. Laughs at my jokes
6. Carries bags of groceries with ease
7. Owns at least one tie
8. Appreciates a good home-cooked meal
9. Remembers birthdays and anniversaries
10. Seeks romance at least once a week

Revised List (age 42)
1. Not too ugly (bald head OK)
2. Doesn't drive off until I'm in the car
3. Works steady -- splurges on dinner out occasionally
4. Nods head when I'm talking
5. Usually remembers punch lines of jokes
6. Is in good enough shape to rearrange the furniture
7. Wears a shirt that covers his stomach
8. Knows not to buy champagne with screw-top lids
9. Remembers to put the toilet seat down
10. Shaves most weekends

Revised List (age) 52
1. Keeps hair in nose and ears trimmed
2. Doesn't belch or scratch in public
3. Doesn't borrow money too often
4. Doesn't nod off to sleep when I'm venting
5. Doesn't re-tell the same joke too many times
6. Is in good enough shape to get off couch on weekends
7. Usually wears matching socks and fresh underwear
8. Appreciates a good TV dinner
9. Remembers my name on occasion
10. Shaves some weekends

Revised List (age 62)
1. Doesn't scare small children
2. Remembers where bathroom is
3. Doesn't require much money for upkeep
4. Only snores lightly when asleep
5. Remembers why he's laughing
6. Is in good enough shape to stand up by himself
7. Usually wears clothes
8. Likes soft foods
9. Remembers where he left his teeth
10. Remembers that it's the weekend

Revised List (age 72)
1. Breathes
2. Doesn't miss the toilet

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you cant look in the mirror and expect it to smile first
 
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tomi
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #63 - 02.03.2003 at 19:57:51
 
> > George W. Bush is hanging out with the Queen of England. He
> > asks her, "How do you run an efficient government? Any
tips
> > you can give me?"
> > And the queen says "Well, the most important thing is
to
> > surround yourself with intelligent people."
> > Bush frowns, and replies, "Well, how do I know the
people
> > around me are really intelligent or not?"
> > The queen takes a little sip of tea, and says, "Oh,
that's
> > easy. You just ask them a riddle."
> > Then the queen pushes the button on her intercom and says
> > "Please send Tony Blair in here, would you?"
> > So Tony Blair walks into the room. "Yes, my
queen?"
> > The queen smiles at Tony and says, "Tony, answer me
this,
> > would you? Your mother and father have a child. It's not
your
> > brother, and it's not your sister. Who is it?"
> > Without missing a beat, Tony Blair says, "Well, that
would be
> > me."
> > The queen smiles and says, "Very good, thank
you!"
> >
> > So, back at the White House, Bush is a bit puzzled. So, he
> > asks to speak with Dick Cheney. "Hey Dick, answer this
for me,
> > would you ? Your mother and your father have a child. It's
not
> > your brother and it's not your sister... who is it?"
> > Dick Cheney frowns and says "Geez, I'm not sure..lemme
get
> > back to you."
> > So, Dick Cheney goes to all his advisors, and asks everyone
he
> > can, but no one can answer it for him. Finally, he ends up
in
> > the men's room, and he recognises Colin Powell's shoes in
the
> > next stall over. So Dick shouts over to him, "Hey
Colin... can
> > you answer this for me? Your mother and your father have a
> > child, and it's not your brother, or your sister. Who is
it?"
> > Colin Powell flushes, and yells back, "Hey, that's
easy...
> > it's me!"
> >
> > Dick Cheney smiles and yells "Thanks!" So, Dick
Cheney goes
> > back into the Oval Office and tells Bush, "Hey, I
finally
> > figured out the answer to that riddle! It's Colin
Powell!"
> > Bush gets up, and angrily stomps over to Dick Cheney.
> > Bush yells right in Dick's face, "No, you idiot! It's
Tony
> > Blair!"
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Pametni razpravljajo o idejah,&&povprečneži o dogodkih,&&omejeni pa o ljudeh. &&(Hyman Rickover)&&
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #64 - 03.03.2003 at 11:17:54
 
Nekoč se je na neki kmetiji zgodilo, da je Konj padel
v živo blato. Nikakor se ni mogel izvleči. Zagledal je
Kuro in ji rekel, naj pokliče kmeta na pomoč. Kura je
takoj odhitela iskat kmeta. Ker ga ni našla, je sama
vzela Mercedes, ki ga je nato pripeljala do Konja,
laso zavezala za branik vozila in tako Konja rešila.


Nekaj dni kasneje je Kura padla v živo blato in se
nikakor ni mogla izvleči. Ko je zagledala Konja, mu je
rekla, naj gre takoj po Mercedes. Konj ji je
odgovoril, da ni časa in da se bo razpel preko mlake,
ona pa naj se prime za njegovo moškost.


Kura je to naredila in se je rešila.


NAUK ZGODBE:
Če imas taksnega kot konj, ne rabiš Mercedesa, da bi ulovil
Kuro...

PS: Ali z drugimi besedami - kdor z majhnim zadovoljen ni, naj si kupi Mercedes!!! Hehehe
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Če bi tisti, ki me obrekujejo, natančno vedeli, kaj si o njih mislim, bi me še mnogo bolj obrekovali.
 
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Gru Gru
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #65 - 03.03.2003 at 17:19:31
 
V smeh me je spravu prav naslov:

Še mal resničnega heca.


In sem šel gledati kdo je začel tematiko.

Neverjetno. En konj z nickom MIKE. Sem pobrskal po spominu in se spomnu, da to sem bil včasih jest.

Jehajta, jehajta. Kako hecno. Mislim, da se bom razpoču od smeha.

Kak naslov: ŠE MAL RESNIČNEGA HECA, he he he.

Kaj pa je resnični hec? Tole, prav tole, življenje in smeh.

no MIKE, me veseli, da si utihnu.

No pa tudi ne, komu se bom pa smejal?

===============================
Še eno sem zapazu. In obenem opozarjam avtorja-admina foruma GAPE-ta, da naj bo previden. Se spomnim, da je Tomaž Domicelj tožil Jonasa, pred časom zaradi naslova ene oddaje, ki je nosila naslov kot njegov album.

GAPE, pa veš, da je album IDEJE IZPOD ODDEJE izdal Andrej Šifrer pred 20 ali več leti.  In kakor forum postaja precej javna zadeva, zna Šifko zavohat kak dodaten vir zaslužka?

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ARS
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #66 - 03.03.2003 at 20:32:35
 
Gru Gru wrote on 03.03.2003 at 17:19:31:
no MIKE, me veseli, da si utihnu.
No pa tudi ne, komu se bom pa smejal?

A dons je pa spet ene par đointov tvoj Ego na višinski sprehod "odpeljalo"?   Grin  
Ma, ja, pa še podobno ime imaš ...  Wink

Sicer pa, dragi moji, tole je čista ZF -
- edina možnost, da se to zgodi, je bla zaprmej samo v reklami:

http://www.geocities.com/aida_ruperts/cajtng.mpg

Cheesy
ARS
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« Last Edit: 04.03.2003 at 20:51:33 by ARS »  

Knowing what's right doesn't mean much unless you do what's right. (neznan(a)
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #67 - 03.03.2003 at 21:44:42
 
Harry, podoben vic kot tvoj o Kuri pa Konju pa Mercedesu je tisti o miškecu in slonu, ko najprvo mišek pade v jamo (in ga reši slon s pomočjo svojega dolgega tiča) nato pa pade v jamo še slon. Reši ga mišek - po mobiju pokliče gasilce, da pridejo s tadolgo lestvijo. Nauk zgodbe: sploh ni važen, če imaš majhnega. Važen je, da imaš mobi!


luštkan vic o slonu in mišu: miš pride na obalo jezera, kjer se kopa slon in ga podi ven iz vode. Po daljšem prepiru se slon odloči, da ustreže mišu, in kakor hitro prileze ven iz vode, mišek ves razočaran reče: Pejt ti kar nazaj v vodo. Vidim, da ti nisi meni kopalk ukradu.
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Ljubezen ozdravlja vse - tiste, ki jo dajejo in tiste, ki jo prejemajo.
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #68 - 04.03.2003 at 22:46:06
 
Dosao Mujo s Fatom u London. Uzeli taxi do hotela i posto je voznja duze trajala taxista se rasprica.

* "Where are you from?"-upita on.

* "We are from Bosnia."-odgovori Mujo

* "Sta kaze?"-pita Fata.

* "Pitao me odakle smo i ja mu odgovorio da smo iz Bosne!"-odgovori Mujo.

Nakon izvjesnog vremena upita taksista ponovo:

* "And where do you live in Bosnia?"

* "We live in Sarajevo."-odgovori Mujo.

* "Sta kaze?"-pita Fata.

* "Pitao me gdje u Bosni zivimo i ja mu rekao u Sarajevu!"-odgovori Mujo

* "Oh, my god, in Sarajevo I had the worst crappity smack in my life!"-rece taxista.

* "Sta kaze?"-upita Fata

* "Kaze da te pozna!"-odgovori Mujo
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #69 - 05.03.2003 at 12:37:30
 
Tole je pa res resnični hec. Sem poslušal po radiju kako Slobo zeza one v Haagu.

Najprej so mu napisali obtožnico v angleškem jeziku. Je rekel, ja to ne razumem.
Nato so mu napisali v srbohrvaškem jeziku in verjetno je prevajalec uporabljal bolj Hrvaške besede. Kao lep..ljep.
In Slobo zopet pove, jaz to ne razumem, ker je pisano v hrvaškem jeziku.

Dober je.

LP Harry
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Če bi tisti, ki me obrekujejo, natančno vedeli, kaj si o njih mislim, bi me še mnogo bolj obrekovali.
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #70 - 05.03.2003 at 12:50:31
 
Quote:
Tole je pa res resnični hec. Sem poslušal po radiju kako Slobo zeza one v Haagu.

Da ga nisi zamešal s Šešljem, ki je med drugim izjavil, da ga iritirajo njihova čudna oblačila, ki ga spominjajo na srednjeveško inkvizicijo in da so pri njih v Srbiji, kao v civiliziranen svetu, sodniki oblečeni normalno - v civilne obleke  Grin Grin



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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #71 - 05.03.2003 at 19:45:21
 
Nisem zamenjal, je pa res, da tudi Šešelj meša štrene. In to hudo. In tista je bosa, ko je Slobo pozval za pričo Radovana Karadžiča. Si predstavljaš sodišče, ki ve, da jih zeza, pa ne smejo p....it.

LP Harry
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Če bi tisti, ki me obrekujejo, natančno vedeli, kaj si o njih mislim, bi me še mnogo bolj obrekovali.
 
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Kaj pa če je vse RES???

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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #72 - 05.03.2003 at 19:49:37
 
Mislite, da ga bojo obsodli preden krepne (Miloševića)?
Po moje ne...
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Pametni razpravljajo o idejah,&&povprečneži o dogodkih,&&omejeni pa o ljudeh. &&(Hyman Rickover)&&
 
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #73 - 05.03.2003 at 20:01:02
 
Obstajajo kazni za taksne?
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Think P O S I T I V E
WWW WWW  
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Re: Se mal resničnega heca 2
Reply #74 - 06.03.2003 at 09:35:39
 
Kako blondinka naredi marmelado?
Olupi krofe...

-...i onda se ja bacim na lava i odrezem mu rep - hvali se lovac medju prijateljima.
-Rep? Valjda glavu?-upita netko.
-Ma ne, glavu je vec netko bio odnio.

Ulovili Bosanci medvjeda. Vidi to Kanadjanin iz SFORA, pa pita: -"Grizli?"
Bosanci-"Sta grizli? Davili bolan, vise od po sata!"

Ulazi Hercegovac u autobus i pita konduktera: - Placa li se za cvijece?
- Ne placa - rece kondukter, a Hercegovac se okrene van i kaze:
- Ruzo,ulazi!
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Nobena čarovnija ne more ničesar spremeniti v kaj drugega, tega ni; sprememba v predstavi v srcu čarovnije je spoznanje, ne ustvarjanje.&&(S. Palwick)
 
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